Trigger

There are always these obstacles hindering our way towards our goal. The same obstacles that made it close to impossible for us to actually live our lives. While for some, they have permitted it to rule over them, I- however- have a different plan in mind as I dominated one of my fears and stepped out of the shadows. Ever since my childhood, I've always had a fascination with firearms as I'd often encounter my brothers playing with their pellet guns, sling shots, 'sulpak', and other shooting 'toys'. However, I rarely had an opportunity to shoot with the aforementioned 'toys' as I rarely played with my brothers. I would often stay in the sidelines which I've grown used to as I'd frequently watch them all day long satisfied in my own world of observation while they paint a picturesque view of laughter and pleasure. Everything changed, however, during a significant event at one point of my 12 years of living. There was such a remarkable turn of events as my father invited the whole family to come with him on one of his own firing sessions. It was the 180 degree-turn that I needed to actually go out of my own shadows. Although my brothers went straightforward for a permission to shoot, I was very anxious and just took a seat at one of the corners. Though I actually had a great desire to try it, but the vast amount of dread and hesitation of coming out of my comfort zone was equally battling with my strong desire like the World War 2 occurring inside of me with both sides equally matched. After an hour or so, my father approached me asking if I wanted to give the pistol a shot. I was at loss of words as I was utterly clueless. Yes, I wanted to fire the pistol as it was like a lifetime dream. My fears-however- kept my mouth sealed and prevented me from coming forward. There was a tormenting inner battle within me for a handful of minutes until I finally managed to reply a shrug to my father, but he countered this with a few words of encouragement that actually caused the clash within me to infinitesimally tilt to the pro-side of firing the gun. I hesitantly stood up and followed my dad towards my place of doom while he gave a set of instructions and precautions. I held the pistol aiming it to the target as time seemed to slow down to a stop. I have never really gotten that far in my life. The anticipation of firing the gun alongside with my dad guiding me at my back was the only thing keeping me glued to my spot. My heartbeat was rapidly beating as it seemed to be the only thing that I was hearing. Dread was the only thing keeping my finger away from the trigger as I stood there for what seemed like hours when it was only just a couple of minutes. Finally, I closed my eyes and let out a deep breath. I pressed the trigger and felt the recoil pulling me backwards. It was such a life-changing experience that made me who I am today. Fear has always been insurmountably part of our lives. It just depends whether you let it rule over your life or not. Life is an experiment to try something new and to find out who you really are and what you're capable of. Always be reminded that fear is just a perception, and it is up to you to make the decisions. Vladolf the cool_NA1